This is such a universal problem that a special society has been formed just for hypocrites. It is a bit like AA in that only people who admit they are not OK can join. It is full of former hypocrites.
What does a former hypocrite look like? They look like someone who knows they are not up to scratch as far as God is concerned; and who has admitted it. Once we admit it, the pretending disappears and we are no longer acting. That is the start.
Only then can a person work out what to do with the ‘not up to scratch’ bit. The thing about this society for hypocrites is that it has a huge subsidy from God. Everyone in it gets daily help from God to live his way – without pretending. And what is most important they get daily pardons for the failures.
The society for hypocrites is actually a kind of foster family in which God acts as father. You join it by owning up to being not up to scratch. It is open to everyone.
Dale